Writing Effective Emails Regarding Problem Transactions

It is inevitable.  Every seller and every buyer will eventually encounter a transaction that has problems.  The problem may be caused by an incorrect description, slow shipping, poor packaging, slow payment or a lost package, but no matter the problem, you can write an effective email that will make the seller/buyer want to work with you to solve the problem to both your satisfactions, even resulting in positive feedback being left for both parties. 

Ten Points to Consider When Writing Your Email:

1. Make sure you have a legitimate complaint first.

Re-read the listing description (including category placement) and shipping details before emailing the buyer or seller. It's easy to glance through a description or ignore the category an item is listed in and miss vital information regarding that item, then assume the seller made a mistake instead of you not reading all the details before purchasing it.  Before sending off that email telling the buyer they shorted you $5 in shipping costs, double-check your listing to see if your shipping rates were mis-typed upon listing or based upon distance instead of the usual flat-rate you use.  If you email about a problem that is simply the result of not reading the listing thoroughly or not proof-reading your listing, not only will you embarass yourself when this fact is pointed out to you by the other party but you will lose credibility as a seller and desirability as a buyer. 

A special note about high shipping fees:  Be sure to double-check the shipping costs in the listing before placing your bid or using Buy It Now.  If the shipping costs are clearly stated, your bid/purchase will be considered acceptance of those shipping charges by the seller, even if they are inflated beyond what you'd expect shipping costs to be for that item. 

2. Don't take it personally.

This is the absolute hardest to adhere to, yet it's also the most important advice I can give.  Unless you are dealing with a downright dishonest seller/buyer (more on these bad apples later), both parties want the transaction to go smoothly.  Therefore, try to view the situation objectively while writing your email.  For example, as a buyer, you purchased a size XL Heirloom Knits cardigan, but received a size small instead.  If you write:

You're so stupid!  You sent me the wrong size!  I want the correct size shipped out pronto or I'm leaving you a negative! 

all you're going to do is make the situation worse.  Instead try writing something that is impersonal, something that presents the problem without emotion and asks for or offers advice on a solution:

I received item #998505050 today, thank you, however, there seems to have been an error in packing as the shirt I received is a small when I had won a size XL.   Please advise me on how you would like me to ship the XL shirt back to you so I can get the correct size shirt sent out instead.  I look forward to hearing from you. 

Any seller getting that email will strive to get the correct shirt to you asap and will appreciate your courtesy and politeness about a simple mistake. 

3. Be polite.

Everyone has heard the expression that you'll get more flies with honey than with vinegar.  Well it became an old adage because it's true.  If you say 'please' and 'thank you' and keep your tone calm and well-mannered, you'll get much better results than if you call names, insinuate dishonesty or act demanding and rude. 

4. Everyone makes mistakes.

The most conscientious seller on eBay can make a mistake.  The fastest paying, most courteous buyer on eBay can also make a mistake.  The seller could miss a stain or a crack or a missing button and the buyer could get caught up in something and forget to make payment on time.  It happens to everyone, without exception, so keep that in mind while writing your email.

5. Be specific.

If you get a item that has a problem, be specific about the problem and about how you would like the problem resolved (i.e. return for refund, replacement or partial refund).  If the buyer hasn't contacted you yet regarding their incorrect address, be specific with what information you require (correct address, alternate address, a US address if you don't ship outside the USA).  If you don't tell the person exactly what you're looking/hoping for then how do you expect to get it?

6. Be flexible and value compromise.

The ultimate goal of communication between a seller and buyer regarding a problem transaction is to find a solution that satisfies both of you.  While satisfaction with the transaction is the goal, total satisfaction may not be achievable.  You may have to compromise, but negotiate a compromise that works for both of you.  For example, if you were mailed a vase and it is chipped, but you love the vase anyway and don't want to send it back, don't demand the seller give you a full refund while you get to keep it too, instead, you should compromise and accept the partial refund that the seller offers you so you can keep the vase.  For example, if the buyer emails you right after the listing ends and asks if they can pay in 15 days instead of your required 10-day time frame, compromise and work out a payment date that works for both of you or set up a series of smaller payments, with one due immediately.

7. Don't expect something for nothing.

If you were mailed the wrong dress, don't expect to keep the wrong one and get your correct one sent to you as well.  The seller may need that one mailed back as it might need to be shipped to another buyer who's waiting for it.  If the buyer sends you a very late payment, even though you told them the sale had been cancelled, you can't keep the payment and not send the item.  You must either return the payment or send the item.  

8. Allow time for a seller/buyer to respond.

I've seen this happen far too often: An unhappy buyer will email a seller five times in the space of three hours and, when they don't get a reply within that three hours, will procede right to negative feedback.  Bombarding a seller/buyer with numerous emails without giving them a chance to respond is pointless, annoying and non-productive for both parties.  People who shop and sell online do have lives outside of eBay and may not check their mail more than once a day.  A good rule of thumb of time to allow for a response is 48 hours during the work week and 72 hours over a weekend as many people may not be home to check their mail over a weekend.  Add a day if the time frame incorporates a national holiday.  If they haven't responded by that time, email again and/or request their User Information and call them. 

You can request a User's contact information here:

http://cgi1.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?UserInformationRequest&hc=1&hm=uu.re`j45733

It's well worth the few cents cost of a long-distance call to sort out a problem 'in person' if email seems to not be getting through.  Email problems do arise and can make communication very difficult.  If you are not getting a response, check your spam folders and spam filter settings.  It's quite possible that the response you're looking for may be blocked by your email program's spam blockers (this is common with AOL users, for example).  Put the seller's/buyer's email address into your accepted emails folder for your spam filter if you want to ensure you receive the response. 

9. Include important identifying information in the email.

In addition to the specific problem and a suggestion for a solution, always include the item number, the title or a paraphrase of the title, your email address, your first and last name (or store name, if you're the seller), the price paid (if important to the problem), the shipping method used/requested and/or your phone number if you'd rather be called because you will be unavailable by email for some reason.  As a seller is is very frustrating to get emails such as this:

I got the wrong item.  What do I do with this thing?

Instead of immediately setting about trying to solve the problem, the seller has to write back and ask Who are you? What item? What did you get instead?  Including your name is very important as it helps the seller/buyer properly address you in their return email as well as be more personal and friendly. 

The same is true when you're a buyer and you get an email like this:

Item was mailed Sat.  It went out late.

Then the buyer wonders What item? How late was it mailed out?  Why was it late?  Who is it that emailed me?  Just by providing the important details, you can cut down on the emails exchanged and get the problem resolved more quickly.

10. Feedback is not the way to contact the seller regarding a problem.

You can solve 90% of problem transactions through polite email exchanges.  Leaving feedback is the very last step in a transaction.  Only leave feedback once the transaction is over for good (you got your item/payment and all is good) or a solution was worked out and both parties are satisfied.  If your first communication with a buyer or seller is through negative or neutral feedback or with a negative comment included in a positive feedback, you may have cut-off any chance you had to get a satisfactory solution to your problem.  Once the feedback is left, the person who received it may be less inclined to work with you towards a solution because they have no incentive to do so.  Negative feedback can no longer be mutually withdrawn, so using feedback to solve problems with a transaction will not work.  Leave feedback only when the transaction and/or negotiation are truly done.  

Due to feedback changes, dishonest buyers can no longer be identified by negative feedback received from sellers they've tried to scam or blackmail, so sellers will need to report dishonest sellers to eBay directly.   

11.  Reward, don't punish, sellers who handle problem transactions properly.

This seems very obvious, but with the new Details Seller Ratings (DSRs) for sellers on eBay, it's not simple anymore.   Despite how it appears, the new seller ratings do not translate to traditional grades, such as 5 stars equal an A, 4 stars equal a B, etc., as least as far as how sellers are rewarded or punished by eBay for their DSR averages.   In school, a B (a 4 on the DSR chart) is considered a good grade, but for sellers a 4.0 average on DSR means they're failing as sellers and they are punished by eBay for it, including reduced exposure in search results and warning emails about their status as 'poor' sellers.  Think about how you would feel if you were still in school and your parents grounded you for a month, cut off your TV time and took away your allowance because you had all Bs or B+s on your report card.   Sellers are feeling this way all the time right now.  Keep this in mind when rating your seller. 

What to do if you encounter a bad seller/buyer:

Unfortunately, there are buyers and sellers on eBay who are just plain dishonest.  My own feedback reflects my personal encounters with these types of buyers/sellers and every long-time seller and buyer will have dings on their feedback records from these dregs of eBay.  Some bad sellers are deliberate scammers out to rip you off while others may have extremely poor customer service and/or dishonest descriptions.  Even if not a deliberate scam-artist there are still bad sellers who won't make amends for their mistakes nor willingly make refunds, exchanges or returns without the buyer filing Paypal claims or other complaints against them.  Some examples of a bad seller are:

• one who intentionally sets out to part you from your money without delivering an actual product or service
• one who intentionally supplies a significantly inferior product from the item that was described or pictured
• one who, whether accidentally or on purpose, glosses over an item's condition, age or size, but then refuses to take responsibility or offer compensation or a return to the buyer who has a legitimate complaint about the incorrect description (more on this below)

A true scam artist's goal is to rip you off by using that user ID until it gets so many negative feedbacks and complaints that eBay boots them off (by making them Not A Registered User or NARU) and/or they get arrested. 

There are also bad buyers, even scam-artists, who intentionally cheat sellers out of products, money and sometimes both.  Some examples of a bad buyer are:

• one who sends a check for payment, which bounces after you've already mailed their item and they never respond to you and make good on the check. 
• one who files a claim of non-receipt of the item, even though they did receive it, just so they can attempt to get the item for free.
• one who drags out payment with repeated promises and delays until they eventually stop responding to your emails or they finally pay months after the listing ended.

  Never jump to the conclusion that every seller/buyer you have the slightest problem with is a deliberate scammer or a genuinely bad eBayer as it's most unjust to the other person.  Once you get into an email exchange with the other party, you'll know fairly quickly if you've encountered a rotten apple.  When you can't get any response to your emails or phone calls, barring the other eBayer having a medical emergency, family crisis or computer/email meltdown, you probably have encountered a bad apple.   To complicate matters, some scammers may use a non-existent medical emergency or family crisis as an excuse.  To weed out the legitimate ones from the liars, I recommend communicating your sympathy and asking the transaction be cancelled so as to make their difficult time easier, with all monies (if paid) refunded and all items returned (if sent).  The genuine ones will gladly do so or they will make the effort to immediately complete the transaction with a proof of mailing provided to you or payment made asap.

How do you handle a problem transaction with such a seller/buyer?  The first step is prevention.  Check the feedback of the seller.   A seller with repetitive negatives for the same behavior/mistakes is a red flag (i.e. chronically late mailing/'missing' packages, nasty retorts to reasonable complaints on their feedback records, etc.).  Consider the positive comments as well as the negatives because they will tell you a lot about how that seller does business (i.e. great packing, better than described, super fast shipping, etc.).   Don't buy from sellers whose feedback indicates they do not care about their customers and/or are actively out to cheat/deceive their buyers.  In the case of sellers encountering bad buyers, you can set your preferences to not accept bids from buyers who do not meet certain criteria, however, keep in mind that you may also exclude many great bidders by using this feature.  

Beware of common scams and fakes.  For example, that seller located in China who's listing a 52" plasma TV for $199.99 with $100 shipping might not actually have a TV to sell you and instead may be out to scam you out of your hard-earned money.   That brand new Dooney & Burke $1500 purse listed for $150 with free shipping from that 2-feedback seller may be selling a poor quality fake.  Look for the earmarks of legitimate sellers - excellent feedback, an established eBay reputation, consistent listings, realistic prices for items compared to their retail values, clear shipping policies for payment and shipping.  Run the other way if you encounter sellers demanding payment by Western Union or via wire-transfer only. 

If it seems too good to be true, it probably is, especially if the feedback, item location and description are 'off'.   With the new feedback changes dishonest buyers can no longer be identified by negative feedback received from sellers they've tried to scam or blackmail, therefore sellers will have to try reading into positive feedback left for hints of possible problems with that buyer, including a large discrepantcy between the number of items won versus the amount of feedback they've received as a buyer.

Use every source of recourse at your disposal.  An important recourse if you've fallen victim to a dishonest seller is to file a claim with Paypal, which is why I highly recommend paying for big ticket items with Paypal.  You at least have some chance of getting a refund of your payment if they seller doesn't send your item.  Take steps to report the dishonest seller to Ebay by including a clear description of all communication up to the time of your complaint.  If you don't bother to complain to eBay you will be letting that dishonest seller continue to rip people off.  You can and should also file complaints with law authorities that handle this type of fraud.

Ultimately, the phrase 'buyer beware' is good advice for shopping on eBay for expensive items.  I mention pricey items specifically because most scammers won't bother with low-priced items.  It's quicker for them to rip off ten buyers for $400 each than a hundred buyers for $40 each as they are trying to get their scams in before eBay or the police shut them down. 

If you're not dealing with a scam artist, but just a seller who likes to take a month before mailing out your item, or didn't consider that small crack worth mentioning, you should enlist eBay's help to resolve the problem.  You can also file with Paypal for your fees back, which spurs most mediocre sellers to either send out your item pronto or to refund your money right away.  If your buyer won't pay up on time, start the bidder dispute process for non-payment as that will cause most slowpokes to either pay up or drop out for good, allowing you cancel the transaction, get your fees back and list it again.   As for buyers claiming they never received an item, I highly recommend using delivery confirmation on every item mailed within the USA.  It's stopped an attempted non-receipt scam more than once for me.   For packages mailed to destinations outside of the USA it gets tougher to prove delivery, but that's a problem rarely encountered, thankfully.   Priority mail international automatically includes indemnity coverage based upon weight or declared value to many countries.  Global priority mail (if available to that country) automatically includes a tracking number on the package. 

Hopefully, your encounters with problem transactions and/or sellers/buyers will be few and far between, but if you do run into one, stay calm, write clearly and stay positive. 

Have fun on eBay!