This guide introduces the common effects of stress on the body, mind and soul. Hopefully the technique of logging or using a diary will help in reducing or managing stress in our daily lives. No one is without it, stress in it’s best form is what keeps us motivated, gets things accomplished, and gets us to take charge. The negative side to stress is it can cause distrust, rejection, anger and depression. Stress left unchecked and balanced is the leading cause of headaches, upset stomach, insomnia, ulcers, and high blood pressure. The definative meaning of stress is Environmental Change. That’s it, just that simple. Stress is anything that upsets the balance of our lives, for good or for bad. Having your daughter get married is a great stressor – planning the wedding, putting up with guests, realizing your baby is leaving home and cleaning up the mess, are the bad stressors that come with the event. How you handle these bad stressors, or should I say, how these bad stressors handle you, is the key. We all face stress; we face it everyday by just getting out of bed. But the goal here is to take charge of stress and make it work for us, not to let stress take charge or us and make it work against us.

Introduction:

There are certain techniques that work well for me as a sufferer of Anxiety Disorder and Agoraphobia. These techniques not only aid in these more severe cases of stress, but can also help those just suffering from stress overload.

stress management

We need to learn more about stress; what causes it, what steps we can do to change the way we handle stress, and learn ways of coping with stress. You can "fight or flight", that is the typical body’s initial response to stress. Being an Agoraphobic (I didn’t leave my house for 4 years between the ages of 19 and 23), the "flight", or running away from, or totally avoiding anything that can trip stress, thus leading to a panic attack, is not the way to handle stress, unless you have no desire to actually "live". After years of therapy, drug therapy, testing, re-introduction into the world, desensitizing, et al., I learned to live with my Agoraphobia, and now do not even consider Agoraphobia as a part of my life. I do still suffer from Panic Attacks, and high level anxiety; but who wouldn’t after raising two children, going through a divorce, working 3 jobs at a time, running a Small Press Literary Magazine, remarrying and gaining 2 small children after mine had flown the coop? My life has never been without anxiety and stress, but my life has been enriched by the fact that I now know; I will never eliminate the stress, but I can learn to cope with it as it appears.

Learn to identify what your stressors are.

Define what you can change and what you can’t.

Reduce your emotional reaction to stress.

Reduce your physical reaction to stress, and use physical activity to decrease stress.

I found logs to be an incredibly useful tool in my recovery process from Agoraphobia and I still find them useful today in dealing with stress. I used my log to define my stressor, my physical and emotional response to the stressor, my management of the stressor and the outcome. As with anything, writing down, in black and white, your issues, makes you take inventory of the situation at hand. The exercise of writing and seeing the visual takes the stressor from the mental stage, to the real stage. Once you have brought your stressors into the "real stage", you can dissect them, investigate their origin, and set a path for alleviation.

There are thousands of ways to use a log or diary in order to make this technique work for you. This is just an example, you can try it, alter it to your needs, or invent your own. The issue is to recognize, analyze and not paralyze. It’s a blueprint, a guide an exercise. Even if it does nothing more than get you to see patterns of anxiety and stressors, that is an enormous start in stress management.

For the following example, I recommend, in the best scenario, that you take time to write your log or diary in an atmosphere of quiet, calm and peace. You may want to set aside 30 minutes to begin your log or diary. After you have made your initial entries, you should only need 10-15 minutes a day to update your progress, analyze your issues, and work on your plan of action. As you get used to logging your progress and your setbacks, a quick 5 minutes might be all that is necessary.

Again, I recommend, if possible that for at least the first entry, you find a quiet, peaceful atmosphere. Get a really nice diary or journal, something special, something that the cover or the pages reflect tranquility. Sounds silly, but it is really an emotional tool. I use logs and lists for everything and a 50 cent spiral note pad is just fine for these jobs, but when it comes to my mental, spiritual (whatever that means to you), psychological health – I found that taking the time to explore book stores, novelty shops, stationary stores, etc. was a great way to get started. You are getting the physical tools for your mental state. I chose a beautiful red satin covered spiral journal with a gold braid bookmark tassel. Red is not the most serene color – but I love it, and to me it represents passion. Being passionate about taking charge of your life is a great step towards balance and harmony. Next, atmosphere, for the first entry, where you are really examining your life and your stressors, I suggest a quiet room with no TV, radio, stereo or any other auditory disturbance. I also suggest an olfactory treat. You can use a diffuser with a drop of lavender oil; this has a great aromatic relaxation quality. You can use a scented candle, such as chamomile, lavender or any other calming scent. You can find these candles and aromatherapy oils at Ebay under New Age, Aromatherapy and Candles.

candles

aromatherapy

relaxation cd's

Now that you have set the mood, write!

I used my first log entry to write down the main stressors in my life at that time. I could not believe how many I came up with. I wrote one stressor a page, in that manner, I had space to write about my work progress. An added note, by writing down only one stressor on the page instead of listing them – your eyes and your mind will not become over-whelmed by a long list. That list may seem insurmountable. One page at a time is more manageable. Next I took a different paper, and wrote down all of the stressors in a vertical line – this was not to overwhelm, but to put in order of severity. I went through the list and assigned each stressor a number in order of most severe stress to the least stressful. I then went back to my journal and gave each page it’s Stressor and it’s number of severity. Next, I wrote on each page under the stressor and severity number, my feelings about the stressor, when they tended to occur, and what my plan of action was.

pen sets

Example:1

Page 1

Driving (1)

(Driving, being agoraphobic is still my biggest stressor, number one for that obvious reason)

Feelings:

I feel inadequate, I feel ashamed, and I feel that everyone else can drive without even thinking about it.

Physical Reaction;

Some days are better than others. Some days I can drive to my appointments, work or wherever. Other days, an anxiety attack will strike out of nowhere, and using breathing techniques I make it to my destination, but it is a real struggle.

Plan of action:

Drive everyday, even if it is just a quick jaunt to the store. One day a week, drive in an area where my anxiety levels go up – such as the freeway, or in rush hour traffic. Use my breathing and relaxation techniques. Listen to something soothing instead of rocking out. Finish my quest, no matter how difficult it is. (Make sure you make these goals manageable, and in baby steps. If you have trouble driving the freeway for example, don’t make your first trek 100 miles, make it 5 and increase it slowly).

Updates:

Date - Today I did fine

Date - Today, I had the worse attack at an intersection, during rush hour. I felt awful, like I couldn’t catch my breath. It lasted about 5 minutes. After I calmed down, I was a bit shaky but continued on.

Do this for each page of your journal. Once a month, pick up your journal and read through it. Put in updates where applicable. Add notes, such as, "this is getting easier", or "I don’t know if I’ll ever get this done". Don’t be afraid to be unpleasant in your log – after all it is yours and no one else’s. If you have a particularly bad experience write exactly how you feel – expletive for expletive.

Keep your log for at least 6 months, updating it frequently, then put it away for a month.

Go back and read your log – pay particular attention to the first few comments. Have you changed? Has your stress level gone down? Do you need to change the numerical importance of your stressors? Do you need to remove some stressors? Can you change the game plan?

Example 2:

Page 2

Stress in the workplace

Feelings:

I feel overworked, overwhelmed, tired. I feel that what I do is of no consequence in the world. I really don’t make a difference. I feel like I’m going crazy in my cubical. I don’t make enough money. I need to work here, because I didn’t finish college and this is the best I can do.

Physical Reaction:

My neck tenses up. My shoulders are up around my ears. I get tension headaches. I get ringing in my ears from my headphones. My hands feel as though they are getting carpel tunnel. I’m cranky with my family when I get home.

Plan of Action:

Look in the Want Ads on Sunday mornings.

Look into tuition reimbursement at work, if it is available; see about going back to school to finish my degree. Take my 15 minute break alone, outside if weather permits, or in a quiet area and do relaxation exercises. Go to Human Resources and ask their advice on advancement in pay and status in the company and how to obtain it. While I’m looking to better myself, try and make each day as pleasant as possible.

Update:

Date – Today I got an appointment with Human Resources to talk to them about career advancement.

Date – Today I got a migraine and went home early, very discouraged.

Date – Today, approached an adversary in my area, and in a pleasant way stood up for myself – I feel great!

Now, put your log or diary away for one month. Do not look at it. After that time period, re-evavaluate. I’ll bet my mortgage payment that you will be surprised at what you find in your log. Some stressors will have changed their number in severity; some will have completely fallen off the chart. Some stressors may need to be added, such as up-coming holidays. Some stressors will need less attention and some more. During this re-evaluation period, set the mood in a quiet, calming atmosphere. Look at each page, and write on a separate paper your list of stressors again. At the end of each page write your up-date.

Example.

Work –I have set goals towards working in another area of the company. I have changed the environment of my cubical to be more calming. I feel more confident and less estranged from my co-workers.

Now on your sheet of paper, add any new stressors you will face, cross off old ones that don’t seem to be of much consequence and issue each of these with a new severity number. Some of the higher stressors may remain in the 1-5 spots, others will have changed, either direction. Get a new journal, again special one, and do the technique over again. Don’t throw out your old log – refer back to it when necessary, and catalog it as you progress in your stress management. Then, of course begin again – keeping track of your progress, your setbacks, and your life.

This is just an example; there are myriads of ways to log and diary your stressors. I truly believe that seeing the stressors on paper will put them into perspective. When you are brainstorming – you may come up with stressors you didn’t even realize were a problem. Or, you may look at something insurmountable and be surprise at what you will be able to accomplish after logging for a few months. In any case, take charge of stress instead of the other way around.

stress management