PLEASE NOTE THAT I WROTE THIS BEFORE EBAY'S NEW RULES...AND WHILE I WAS STILL A SELLER.  MAYBE THIS WILL SHED SOME LIGHT.

I hope that all who read this will take it in the spirit that it was intended.

I have a great reputation, even from my returns.  Even THEY have given me positives!  I pride myself on my honesty, integrity and my customer service.  The first two I live by in my real life and all three are a part of my being a seller on eBay..

Honesty.  Integrity. Excellent customer service.

THESE are not difficult words, methinks, but some seem to find them hard to live by.

Still, just a little bit of kindness and simple manners between buyers and sellers would solve the problem that I and many other sellers AND buyers have on eBay.

Yes, I sell.  But I also BUY.  For myself and my family.  Would I buy from a person who was rude to me afterward or sent me fake items?  NO.  I would not.  BUT...even if they were conning me, I would remain polite.

Would I SELL to someone that I knew would be nasty to me later and not even be courteous enough to send me a HALF-WAY kind letter, although I have shipped and their item hasn't arrived, two weeks via Priority, despite my best efforts and the problem being not MY fault?  NO.  I would not. 

Could I pick and choose my customers, I would tell them that I am always kind and friendly and if they are not the same, please buy elsewhere.  I have enough problems in my own little world AND I just brood and get upset when someone is nasty. 

I would definitely choose nice customers and choose to sell less rather than have nasty customers upsetting me.  I do not apologize for this as I am always kind so I don't NEED to apologize because a buyer or seller has hurt my feelings.

I am me and I will NOT apologize for being sensitive.  Regardless of what end of eBay I am on when that ugliness happens.

So, yes, perhaps I am too sensitive for this business.  I AM reconsidering my place here.  I give money back immediately if the customer is not happy, INCLUDING their shipping, which most sellers will not do.  Do these customers even realize that the shipping money that I return to them is money that I spent from my OWN pocket and I do not get reimbursed, period?  Not even tax-wise, as I do not make enough to take a loss.  I have done the right thing and I do not have a bad taste in my mouth afterward, I feel that justice has been done.  It just seems unfair to me for the buyer to be out one single penny if the merchandise is not up to par, although I received it from my own sellers in that condition. 

I do NOT need an email from a customer whose priority package I shipped two weeks ago shoot off an email to me saying "Paid 5-28.  Not received.  Preparing to leave negative feedback.  Money back immediately or else".

UGH.  I have my proof, of course, I keep all files, shipping receipts and emails but that doesn't stop a bad buyer from being a jerk.  I send those copies to my buyer.  Funny, buyer already left me feedback for something not received.  Hmmm...figure that one out.

ALSO, ATTENTION, PLEASE!!  My shipping ALWAYS has a confirmation number as well as a ship date.  I ship same day or the next (if I received your payment too late for that day), except on Sunday.   Failproof.  It went out that day or the next, NO LATER.  Please check your email for the tracking number and shipping date, it is definitely THERE unless you've changed your email address from what is on file with eBay or Paypal.  .

This should make it fairly simple.  You do NOT send an email like the one I mentioned three paragraphs above.  Politeness?  I will even give tips here:

(BUYER)   "Hi!  I paid for my earrings on May 28th and haven't received them.  I've checked the tracking (or not), cannot figure out what has gone wrong.  Could you please help me track them down or tell me what date you shipped, as I cannot find my confirmation email with the tracking number.  Thank you so much!"

(SELLER)  "Hi!  I sold you a pair of earrings on May 28th and haven't received your payment yet.  I realize that we all have lives and sometimes things go wrong...family illness or bad internet or computer, tragedy or lack of funds.  Please email me as soon as possible and let me know if you still want the earrings as well as when and how you'll be paying for them so I can continue to hold them for you.  If you don't want them after all due to whatever circumstances, I will happily file a dispute that says we have BOTH agreed not to complete the transaction, so that it will not be a "strike" against you and hurt neither of our accounts.  Thank you so much!"

I'd rather the jerks buy elsewhere.  I am always nice.  I expect the same and treat everyone kindly.  If  you cannot be kind in your emails when there is a problem with what I've shipped, I'd rather you just not buy from me.  If you DO buy, my guarantee stands firm...even for jerks.  (I will not tell them they are jerks, of course, I am too polite...but I DON'T have to underline it for them to realize that they are being jerks when I respond in such a kind voice...I think they get the point).

Also I may buy from you as well, if I know your store.  If you are kind.  Otherwise, hang it up because you won't get a dime from me.  And...to the buyers I've already purchased from that were nasty afterwards?  I won't do business with you again.

All of the above is why I will probably always be poor.  lol

LAST but DEFINITELY not least....FEEDBACK, FEEDBACK, FEEDBACK!!

I leave feedback for you the moment that I see you have paid.  I would hope that you would PLEASE do the same for me when your item arrives, if you are pleased.  If you are NOT, I will gladly refund all.  I know I've gotten stuck with a household FULL of junk because I'm too nice to tell someone who gave it to me that it's ugly as sin and gives me nightmares.  LOL

As I said, as a seller I leave feedback IMMEDIATELY upon payment.  My reason is simple.  YOU have fulfilled YOUR part of our agreement, which is to PAY for what you ordered.  That's YOUR part and that is all that is required of the buyer, that is ALL.  I truly dislike buying from someone who says "we'll leave you positve feedback when you've done this for us".

Why is this?  The buyer has done as promised, have they not??  Thus, feedback upon payment.  PERIOD.  Anything else is dishonest and simply retaliatory.  More nastiness.  What's the title of my guide again?

Now, as a seller, it's up to ME to fulfill MY part of the bargain - which is to deliver your item in a timely fashion in the condition I promised OR return your money.  PERIOD.

Forgive me, I know I will be insulting some people...but INTEGRITY does not rely on how you are treated by your buyer, it relies on how YOU respond as an honest seller.

Common courtesy between PEOPLE...is that so very rare?

With warm regards,

Deb (mary45a)

And please vote for my guide if you've found it useful in any way!