( - When Chuck Norris kills, God takes it as a blessing not a sin.
- When Chuck Norris is hungry he eats.
- Chuck Norris doesn't get wet from the rain because the rain dodges Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris taught Bruce Lee, Jakie Chan, and Jet Li then kicked their asses.
- Hercules' real name was Chuck Norris.
- People who called Chuck Norris an idiot were never seen again.
- Chuck Norris' feet are made from solid gold.
- Chuck Norris doesn't need a job to get money. He just shows his face and people put money in his pockets.
- Chuck Norris can stop a speeding race car with only his pinky.
- Chuck Norris doesn't need a dog. He house trained Godzilla to fetch the paper.
- Chuck Norris doesn't die he just goes to heaven and beats God in a arm wrestling contest. Then he goes back down to earth to kick more ass.
- Chuck Norris is the reason Micheal Jackson has a fake nose.
- Chuck Norris' hair was originally brown, then blood stained it red.
- When Chuck Norris drives he tells the light to go green.
- When Chuck Norris fell down the stair, the stair were bruised and broken.
- CNN was originally the Chuck Norris Network, but Chuck Norris sold for the role in a TV program.
Guide created: 07/11/07
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